There is so much pressure being a woman; men have no idea! Today I wanted to discuss a topic I think many of us beat ourselves up over and that is FLAWS!
If you want to embrace or improve on one of your flaws or maybe more, this exercise has helped me, and I believe it can help you too.
Grab a piece of PAPER & PEN and keep reading!
First, let’s discuss why you should own your flaws, and second jot yours down on your paper.
Why Own your Flaws
Only you have your flaws (Own that ISH)
Imperfections are HOT
Perfect is Boring & Unattainable *Mostly photoshopped
Use it for improvement (Keep reading I’ll explain)
Someone Else loves your Flaw
Write it Down
Jot everything that comes to mind, leave room to the right as you will want to add a few things a bit later.
Once you have your list written down, don’t feel alone, because I want to share with you mine. I tend to be a pretty private person. However, if I can share my journey and it can help others, I’m all for it.
- Dyslexia ( since childhood I’ve mixed up my words. I’ll tell you below how I work to overcome this flaw.)
- Pointy Elbows ( I could use them as weapons if need be) *Embraced
- Pigeon-Toed (Although my mother won’t accept it, luckily my husband loves it)
- Big Feet
Ok, so these are just a few of mine, the list actually could go on! I threw in some heavy hitters on that list, and I hope you don’t feel alone or ashamed about your list BELIEVE me we all have baggage one way or another. Ok, enough about me, let’s talk about YOU! Once you have your list written out, take a good look at it and write down embrace or improve beside each flaw.
Let’s discuss before you write these down!
There are some things we can’t change about ourselves, and those are the things that make you so unique. In fact, there is someone you might not have met quite yet who will love that one thing about YOU! Can you imagine if Cindy Crawford got rid of her famous mole!? I mean that’s what makes her so iconic. I think it’s time for you to embrace yours and celebrate it. OWN IT & embrace it!
So turn that negative thought about that flaw you have, and turn it into something positive. If you have trouble believing it, just use positive words of affirmation until it sticks. Sometimes it’s easier said than done, but this will help jump start it.
I love my ____________ flaw ; it makes me a unique SEXY MOFO individual. P.S. I don’t even know if the word MOFO is cool to use these days. GAHHHH I’m getting old!
So, let’s talk about this, NOT all of your flaws do you need to accept, especially ones that drive you crazy. If I had written my list from 5 years ago, it might have had some other things on it that I’ve already improved on so it wasn’t necessary to add it.
Quick Story about how I chose to Improve on one of my Flaws
I’ve danced with this love/hate relationship of dyslexia for years. While it’s something I still struggle with, I’ve used this flaw for fuel to improve on it. I often was told by some, including loved ones that I was slow, dumb and just couldn’t keep up with my peers. I was in Sylvan learning center as a child, and I spent the majority of my childhood just trying to keep up. Although this flaw did exist, I have to work twice as hard to improve on it.
When I was in college I spent double the amount of time in the library than most, things didn’t and still don’t always come easily to me. In fact, most learning curves come from my failures; I use resilience to catapult me to the next level. The ironic thing about having dyslexia is that I graduated top of my class with a BA in Mass Communications. I guess the constant frustration of mixing up my words, led me to overcome it by doing a lot of public speaking.
I don’t tell you that I graduated at the top of my class to gloat; I tell you this because if you have a flaw on that list that you want to improve on DIG deep because it’s possible to improve and you don’t have to accept it! Some will doubt you, LET them! To be honest, their opinion of you is none of your business.
Now, this is something I’m always going to struggle with, so I have to condition myself to work at it. I read books; I do ToastMasters every other week. I will, and I do stumble, and I sometimes won’t pronounce things the right way, I get embarrassed however I keep pushing to improve on this flaw. So the thing you want to improve on might be a forever journey for you, that’s ok because I’m sure if you wrote down your list you are up for the challenge.
Once you have decided to improve on that flaw, fear will creep in time to time. Be strong and bold this is self-doubt don’t let her or anyone else get into your head.
Is it time to improve, but where to start? Well, thank the Lawd for the power of the internet. There might be others out there looking to improve on something similar, and there are many sources out there who can help. Sometimes you don’t have to do it alone. I also would say to lean on the people you trust and let them know you are ready to confront this flaw and might need some emotional support time to time.
So what flaw on your list are you ready to improve?
Get excited; this life can be whatever you make it.
I hope you found this post useful to take into your everyday life and most importantly love yourself and love others. There have been so many crazy things going on in this world, let’s be kind and smile at one another, it could make someones entire day.
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Photographer: Timothy Chaplin